What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Why are people of mixed race seen as more attractive than non-mixed-race people?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Men are more likely than women to die of broken heart syndrome, study finds - CNN

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

2025 NBA Finals preview: Thunder vs. Pacers storylines, including star PG matchup and Paul George history - CBS Sports

Make Nazis afraid again!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

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The ‘Mountainhead’ House: Finding the Perfect Horrible Location Almost Delayed Jesse Armstrong’s Movie - IndieWire

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Why cant I sleep even tho I am sleepy? I am not anxious or worried but my body just doesn't want to. I've been awake for almost 2 days and feel sleepy but I cant sleep. My doctor said its anxiety related but its not. Is this normal?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Why does my crush always looks at me in a sad way whenever I talk with other boys, and if he catch me staring on him then he go and flirt with other girls and then check if I am looking at him?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

What are the legal obligations of a new homeowner if the previous owner leaves furniture in the house after moving out?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

What are the extra benefits of a smart TV?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Why did Sumire's summoning Nue act strangely in response to Kawaki's karma?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

How should you handle a situation where your friend tells you they like someone who also likes you? Should you tell them or continue as normal?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.